i tend to think about this a lot too.
i, personally have always been deeply emotional and initially it has been an all or nothing sort of situation where i either show empathy or indifference, and in the case of indifference, its a protective mechanism so that i don’t get over involved and get in too deep where I’m drowning in somebody else’s sorrows. and yes, you do tend to want to fix things and when they don’t fix you feel like you’ve failed, like it was your responsibility somehow and you didn’t fulfil it.
i do think that being emotional is very hard. However, although difficult, it becomes easier when you learn to let go. that is usually something that is prompted by something that happens in your life that makes you realise that you really are not here to control what happens next, rather you are here to live and so just start to accept it and take it as it comes, this is a a slow and gradual process. for me, it involved the aid of a therapist. somehow, as you progress thought the transition you get a lot better at letting things come as they do, and go as they do, sort of like a traveller passing through life.
there is a flip side to this though, being emotional is beautiful, it feels real, its like being so fully immersed in everything you do and everything you feel , when you go through a transition that allows you to control this, you become more cautious with your feelings, you become more reserved, your experiences have damaged you and even though the first time you had ever said the words ” i love you” they just slipped out and it was so easy. you stand there in front of someone who you love thousands of times as much as the person who heard them that first time and they get stuck in this massive lump of hurt that still sits in your throat. i suppose thats the part of the learning curvet that I’m at right now and i know one day it will get better.
so i suppose what I’m trying to say is that, being emotional is hard, but that doesnt mean cutting yourself off from emotion is easier, there is some sort of balance that we have to reach, where we immerse ourselves in the right emotions and the ones that matter enough for us to immerse ourselves in them. its a massive learning experience and its hugely difficult but with every step you start to discover a new you that you like more and more with each progressive stage.
if i had to leave with a word of advice though it would be this.
show sympathy, but empathy is never a good thing, not for prolonged periods of time i mean. if you are able to be empathetic for a moment, it gives you insight but being empathetic indefinitely will destroy you. help without immersing yourself, you are more helpful that way. Keep feeling, but dont ever reveal your weakness, because vulnerability ushers exploitation and remember that you are human, its ok to fall sometimes, getting back up and working to fix it is what is important
i hope this was useful and when you feel comfortable, please do come off anon. id love to know who this was :)